What I know

One of my writing instructors, from long ago, often quoted Mark Twain. She’d say, “Write what you know.”

There’s wisdom in that. We really can’t write what we don’t already know. Even fantasy and fiction draws from our own life experiences.

I’ve been at a loss for words lately. I know things. I have stories to share but they’re obstructed.

Is there a creative roto-router? You know…something I can use to loosen up and smooth out this damed up, constricted pathway that hinders my words?

Write what you know…

All I know is what is happening within the four walls of my home.

It’s been a difficult 6 months here. If you’ve been reading my blog, especially pre 2018 and before I took a 4 year hiatus from this community, you know about the medical journey my husband, Bob, has been on and my role as his caregiver.

The last month has presented some new challenges for us. One particular hard day in December, Bob sat on the sofa struggling to breathe. I walked over to reposition him and I tripped over his oxygen tubing. He’s never needed oxygen before so this is a new fixture in our home. My foot caught the tube and before I knew it I was flying across our living room and landed on both of my knees. The hardwood flooring didn’t cushion the blow.

I sat there and wept, criticizing myself for being so careless. Then Bob wept. We were both exhausted. Thankfully I didn’t break anything and when I managed to get up, I grabbed my Bible and sobbed, we need to pray, Bob.

As I walked toward him a 3×5 card fell out of my bible. On it were the words:

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10

It’s a familiar verse that has helped Bob and me through some tough spots over the past 6 years

I hadn’t read it recently but it was just what I needed…what we both needed.

Bob said, “That’s God. He’s letting us know that we’re not alone.”

Two days later we received a card from my daughter-in-law’s aunt. We’ve only met her once but she sent cards to us after Bob’s bone marrow transplant and again after his open heart surgeries.

This one was precious. She wrote a lovely hand written note saying she was thinking about both of us and that our journey helped her and her husband stay positive during his journey through cancer. Sadly, he passed away last year.

At the end of her note she shared her favorite verse that she clung to and recited throughout the day to stay calm and hopeful during the most difficult days of her husband’s battle. It was the same verse that fell out of my Bible … Isaiah 41:10.

So this is what I know. God is listening to our prayers. He’s still with us in this struggle and telling us not to be afraid.

Blessings,

Nancy

18 thoughts on “What I know

  1. Wow, I got chills reading this post. For someone who is feeling obstructed, you sure have a beautiful way of expressing yourself, Nancy! 🙂

    As hard as it is to gain perspective when you are pinned down with physical limitations and caregiving, it sounds like you and Bob are doing an amazing job with the hand of God sometimes put reminders right in your way. Bless you for sharing this at a glimpse of life as it is. Both blessed and difficult. I can relate to that.

    Sending my best to you both!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I like how you phrased that, Wynne … blessed and difficult. It’s often the case isn’t it? Often our greatest blessings come out of the most difficult of times. Thank you for your comment.

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  2. I can relate to what you are going thru, Terry has copd and heart problems. He has been on ox over a year now, he only get out the house to go to the dr. He has been in and out of the hospital, has had fluid taken off his lungs three time. God helps me deal with all of this – I will keep both of you in my prayers Hugs

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    1. Thank you, Sally. It’s good to know that someone can relate. Praying for you two as well. God is good and is never late with his help. So thankful for his mercy and grace.

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  3. God’s ‘coincidences’ appear in many ways at difficult times to comfort and remind us that He will never leave or forsake us, and can bring beauty for ashes. You and Bob have Him, each other, and my prayers Nancy for the strength and peace only He can and will bring to you in this struggle which will last but for a moment in the perfect eternity He has prepared for us.

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  4. Beautifully written! So glad that God was right there the whole time and could speak to you both in your time of need. Thanks for the reminder of a wonderful verse to remember and keep on our “speed dial”. Continuing to pray for you and Bob.

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    1. He knows what we need and I’m thankful for that. I’m definitely keeping that verse on my “speed dial.” Thank you, Ruth.

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  5. I , just now, took time to read this, my friend. That verse and Isaiah 40:28-31 are some of my favorites….in fact are marked in my Bible. God shows up at just the tight time, doesn’t He ? My heart hurts for you both…this is just plain hard…. Love to you both.

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    1. Oh how my heart hurts for you, Bonnie! Isaiah 40: 28-31 is dear to me too… especially 29-31. That is highlighted in my Bible. Thank you for bringing it to my attention again. He does give strength to the weary and I hope you feel that from him now along with comfort and peace. I pray that over you! Love you dear friend ❤️

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  6. Such a lovely post, Nancy! Thank you for sharing how God is faithful during times of difficulty. I think we all can use a little encouragement these days. Praying for you and Bob.
    For your writing, I’ve learned… during times I can’t pour out He is pouring in. Take heart, you will be overflowing in a while and the words will stream from your pen. God is faithful to supply our needs! And a writer needs words! Blessings. ☺

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    1. I appreciate your comment, Gail. “During times I can’t pour out He is pouring in.” I feel that and sense it’s time to just rest in God. Thank you. Blessings! ❤️

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  7. The verse you posted here is such a blessing to us all. We are never alone and God does listen to our prayers! It is not easy to be a caregiver and you do not know it unless you have actually done it. My sister and I cared for my mother in our homes over a period of fifteen months. In the end, she too was on oxygen. My sister and I took turns, so we got a break in between. Still, you worry constantly about this person…You always feel that you are not doing quite ‘enough’. That is due in part to the awareness that you cannot ‘fix’ things. In the midst of it all, God is always there, supporting us, loving us, giving us strength. Looking back, I would never trade this time with my mother, even though there were some hard moments. I am stronger and wiser, and yes, I see the hand of God every step of the way. I wish you peace on this journey you travel…praying for you and your husband.

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    1. What a beautiful and thoughtful comment, Linda. What you stated about worrying about the person and feeling you’re not doing ‘enough’ is something I wrestle with. Watching my husband suffer and knowing I can’t ‘fix’ things is heartbreaking but I do know God is providing me with strength and encouragement. Your comment is something I needed to read tonight. Thank you.

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